happy spring


I’m not on a trip. I’m at home. I’m not cooking Easter dinner – well, just for Matt and me. You could say I’m not doing much of anything, but the fact is, I’m barely surviving. If can just get through the next two weeks - I’ll have a whole fresh set of obstacles.

     There are a number of people I want to reach out to at this thoughtful time of year, and there isn’t enough time to write you all, also, not enough strength or endurance in my sore wrist. Hence – a generic letter.

     It was a merciless winter. Toronto specialized in fractures, and Matt and I were two of them: his ankle, requiring two hours of surgery a couple of pins and a plate and six weeks in a wheel chair in a Reactivation Centre before he could put his foot down; my wrist, with twisted bones that had to be pulled straight a couple of times - fairly effective. It was the timing of our recovery that made it hard, with conflicting appointments and damaged skills. I realized how much he does for himself until he couldn’t. I had to take up the slack but it was hard getting a grip with only one hand. As for touch-typing, forget it. Even now without a cast, it hurts.

     John and his wife, Lesley, are very busy but they did a lot for us. Lesley’s position in the health hierarchy of Toronto enabled her to get Matt into Hillcrest Reactivation Centre and then into Toronto Rehab, and that was enormously helpful. As for the paperwork, mine and Matt’s, because his was a workplace injury and because he is assisted by ODSP (Ontario Disability), and because I had ongoing projects I was working on and because I had one functioning finger to write with, I was slow coping, not to say incompetent. Kate came up from Boston, arriving the day after my fall, staying for a week, and she was incredible, thinking of everything that had to be done and doing it before I could focus.

     Looking back, it’s hard to condense the pain, angst and dismay of the last 8 weeks – was it only 8 weeks?  It felt longer.  I learned a lot, mainly that I have been very lucky to survive so far and that I have been arrogant in my wellness. Oh, and then there’s the lesson I thought I had learned after Bill’s death: you find out who your friends are.

     That brings me to this Easter milestone. I do want to wish you a glorious, happy, thoughtful spring. Do not ever take it for granted.