help?

I’ll tell you how…if I could figure it out myself.

My self-publishing company has a deal with Amazon, but the print-on-demand agreement is killing me. See, Amazon started off with a few (?number?) print books which they sold right away, I guess. My daughter in Boston bought a hardback for herself and five paperbacks for her daughters and sister-in-law and best friend. A week later, a friend in Oregon told me that Amazon says there are no print copies available, and both .ca and .com now say delivery in one to two months. In the meantime, they have an E-book ready to go.

Their treatment of what they call book-and-mortar bookstores is not very nice.

My best plan seems to be to buy the books myself, for no royalties, paying the printing and shipping — and then, sell them, at an appealing price with a small profit to cover my costs. (I’ll never cover my costs!). Anyway, I am now practicing shameless self-promotion, offering myself as a speaker, teacher, guru—whatever—and then offering to deface the book with my signature.

So how can you help? Well, if you buy something from Amazon, give me a review. Apparently if I get 50 reviews ai get a box of Cracker Jack, or something.

Right now, Book City bookstore on Danforth has a few signed copies of my book, not because they’re so enthusiastic about the book but because I am a loyal local customer and they didn’t have to buy it. Maybe someone else will.

I’m getting a few speaking gigs. If you are a member of a book club I’ll come and talk to you, if you’re not too far away.

I have done some speaking and teaching for Ryerson University, to their Over 50 program. (Fifty is so young!!) I wrote Ryerson about me and I will be launching a new program of theirs in January: Literary Talks. I am very literary.

And I am having a private book launch in the Board Room of my apartment building - tonight. I’m offering a glass of wine and a chance to snap up a copy of my book while it’s hot. I’d like to say the book is free but this wine will cost you 15 dollars but I’m afraid people will choose not to drink.

If all else fails, tell your friends. I remember insurance agents telling me that when they started out they thought they could sell a lot of insurance to their friends. Not so. If you count on your friends for sales you won’t get very far. But maybe your friends can help, and your friends’ friends.

I live in hope.