Three announcements of deaths within the last week: one, a very old woman who had pretty well left her body; two, the brother of a friend after a three-week hopeless illness; three, yesterday, the husband of a close friend with no warning, as far as I know, I don't know the details yet. I am so sorry for the pain of loss suffered by close ones.

What can I say? At my age I know for a fact that no one is immortal. As my late husband used to say, "One out of one dies of something." And I have already said, keep saying, that I feel like a duck in a shooting gallery, surviving so far, but with everyone being picked off all around me, it's just a matter of time.

So it is with everyone: just a matter of time. Rather than rage against the dying of the light, I try to concentrate on what brightness there was. I really am grateful for what gleams have been granted to us. And I still say, in spite of everything, have a reason to get out of bed in the morning, however slowly. Some days are darker and slower than others.

De mortuis nil nisi bonum. About the dead, nothing but good. (I think I got that right.) That's what wakes and shivas are for, what mourning is for: to remember the good times and the good things about the most recent absentee, to honour the life that was and to cherish the memories. "What comfort is in me. If thou shouldst never see my face again pray for my soul. More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of."

And prayer can take many forms. This is one of them.

I was thinking some more about my seedbed bookcase, looking it over. It's always a surprise. Ideas that attracted me still amaze me and get the cogs going. Take Erving Goffman (1922-1982). I often do. I first came across him in 1972 wen I read a review of his book, Relations in Public, New irk, Basic Books. He was already well known by that time, well on his way to what he is now considered to have been one of the finest sociologists of the 20th century. I began to buy and read his books, most published before that review I kept. I have:

The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life, 1959

Encounters: Two Studies in the Sociology of Interaction, 1961 (but my edition is dated 1985)

Behavior in Public Places, 1963

Stigma: Notes on the Management of Spoiled Identity, 1963

Of course, I'm not a sociologist, but I found what Goffman has to say - and you'll pick up on it immediately from his titles - I found his insights enormously fascinating and useful to my development as a playwright. I even found some of my notes indicated possibilities of plays based on his analyses of people and their relationship. .Later I was told that Goffman was on a drama course at the National Theatre School.

Not only are there not enough hours in each day to do what I want to do, learn, think about, accomplish and write, there aren't enough years in my life. The darn thing is, in spite of my desire, I get tired. I goof off, I take naps, I play. What am I going to do?